


The Official Tester

by iwant2baweasley (becboobear)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: AU, Community: smutty_claus, F/M, HP: EWE, Post Deathly Hallows, Smut, Smutty Claus 2012
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-09
Updated: 2013-01-09
Packaged: 2017-11-24 07:24:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,129
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/631902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/becboobear/pseuds/iwant2baweasley
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fred and George are launching an adult toy line and need a witch to test the new products. They proposition Hermione and she agrees to help.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Official Tester

**Author's Note:**

  * For [themadmermaid](https://archiveofourown.org/users/themadmermaid/gifts).



> This story was written for [themadmermaid](http://themadmermaid.livejournal.com/) who gave me several awesome prompts and the one I chose was "Fred/George/Hermione should be something that Hermione knows she shouldn't do, but does anyway and likes it. Any setting fine."

The teacup slipped from Hermione Granger’s hand and smashed against the table, shattering on impact.  
  
“You want me to what?!” she exclaimed, staring in shock at the ginger twins sitting across from her.  
  
When Fred and George had invited her out for breakfast, she’d been curious, naturally. Especially since they’d mentioned something about having a business proposition for her; the twins were usually very tightlipped about their shop and anything having to do with it. It was her curiosity that had her rolling out of bed extra early on a Thursday morning to meet them at a café in Muggle London.  
  
If only she’d known just what their proposition had entailed.  
  
“Before you get offended, please hear us out,” George said, quickly.  
  
“I was offended the moment you two asked me if I would -” she lowered her voice to barely a whisper “- test your adult toy line for you over _BREAKFAST_?!”  
  
“We wanted to be professional about it,” Fred replied. “Plus Georgie here was sort of afraid you’d hex us.”  
  
 _That explains the location_ , a sarcastic voice in her head said.  
  
“Just hear us out, Hermione,” George pleaded desperation in his voice.  
  
“You’re the only witch we really trust.”  
  
“What about Ginny?”  
  
Both twins made a disgusted face.  
  
“Our sister does not have sex.”  
  
“So how did she get pregnant then?”  
  
“Magic.”  
  
“What about your sisters-in-law?”  
  
“Can’t imagine we’d live very long if we asked Bill to let Fleur try our toys.”  
  
“Though, it might be funny to watch that vein grow in Percy’s neck…”  
  
“Until he murders us with one of those thin bottomed cauldrons he has stashed in his office….”  
  
“What about Angelina? Or Katie?”  
  
Hermione knew she was grasping at straws, but surely there had to be someone else they could ask for help.  
  
“They’d get too caught up in their feelings about us to judge our products the way they should.”  
  
“What about my feelings?”  
  
“Are you saying you’re in love with us, Miss Granger?”  
  
“What? No! Of course not!”  
  
The twins smiled.  
  
“That’s why we like you, Hermione; you tell us how it is, even if it hurts.”  
  
“That’s exactly why we need you. You’re blunt and to the point.”  
  
 _You’re going to say yes_ , a voice in her head said. _Just do it and get on with your life._  
  
 _No! What they are asking is completely inappropriate_ , a second voice spoke up. _As businessmen they should know that. Not to mention that as Ron’s older brothers-_  
  
Hermione stopped listening to the voice as Ron’s image came to mind. Of course! Why hadn’t she thought of him sooner?  
  
“What about Ron?” she asked.  
  
“What about him?” They chorused.  
  
“How do you think he’ll feel knowing that I’m helping you test your new line?”  
  
Surely, the Weasley brothers had a pact or something that kept them from going after each other’s exes.  
  
“Why do you care about how he’ll feel about it?” George asked. “Shouldn’t he be the last person you should care about?”  
  
“He’s the reason you’re single, Hermione,” Fred added.  
  
“He’s your brother.”  
  
“Or so mum and dad tell us.”  
  
Hermione sighed. She wished that she could take out her wand and repair her tea cup, but she knew she couldn’t.  
  
“At least consider our offer,” Fred said, after a moment. “Don’t make your mind up now.”  
  
“And we can do it whenever works best for you,” George added. “We can even come to you if you’d like.”  
  
There was something in the way he said “we” that caught Hermione’s attention. Why would they need to come to her if she was testing their products? Couldn’t they send them home with her and then wait for comments?  
  
“When you say _we_ ,” she said, slowly. “Are you implying that you _both_ would need to be present for the testing?”  
  
“Yes,” they chorused.  
  
“But only for safety reasons,” George added, quickly.  
  
She narrowed her eyes at the twins. They had been through this conversation before, she could tell that now. They’d obviously gotten this far, but the witch, or witches, had backed out upon learning that both brothers would be present for the testing.  
  
“Why me?” she asked them. “And skip the line this time.”  
  
“You’re pretty, Hermione, but you aren’t exactly our type of witch,” Fred said.  
  
“And aside from being ginger and definitely more handsome than our younger brother, we aren’t exactly your type either.”  
  
“Therefore all three of us could enter into this as nothing but a scientific experiment.”  
  
“The perk for you is obviously getting some extra money and getting off in the process.”  
  
“Shut up, George. You’re going to make her say no if you put it like that.”  
  
Hermione leaned back in her chair. What they said was true; they had some similarities to Ron, obviously, but they were also very different. Needless to say, they caused too much trouble for her liking.  
  
 _You could use the gold, though_ , one of the voices said.  
  
 _There are better ways to earn money towards a down payment for a house!_ The other voice argued.  
  
 _Well, it’s been months since you’ve had an orgasm from something other than your fingers_ , the first voice retorted.  
  
 _This is a horrible idea!_ The second voice exclaimed.  
  
It was too late, though, because Hermione had already made up her mind.  
  
“I’ll do it.”  
  
“Really?” The twins chorused. They seemed just as surprised as she was that she’d said yes.  
  
“Yes,” she replied. “But here are my terms. You two come to my apartment tomorrow night, using the floo, and no one else learns of my involvement.”  
  
“Deal.”  
  
She shook hands with the twins, finalizing their verbal agreement.  
  
As she left the café, a few minutes later, Hermione was tormented by the two voices in her head.  
  
 _This is going to be fantastic!_ One voice said.  
  
 _This is going to be a disaster!_ The other countered.  
  
\---  
  
Upon arriving home the next evening, Hermione’s first stop was the liquor cabinet in her kitchen. Most of the bottles in the cabinet were wine, but she always kept a bottle of Ogden’s on hand as it was Harry’s favorite drink.  
  
She pulled the bottle of Ogden’s out and set it on the counter. She wasn’t particularly fond of Firewhiskey, but her nerves had been a complete mess all day and she needed the courage. No matter how superficial said courage was.  
  
She pulled her hair back in a sloppy bun and then poured a small amount of Ogden’s into a glass. After taking a deep breath, she lifted the glass to her lips and drank the amber liquid quickly. She clutched her chest as the whiskey went down, leaving a burning feeling in its wake.  
  
Setting the dirty glass in the sink, she grabbed a wine glass and removed the cork from a bottle of red wine. She poured the wine into the glass and then went down the hall to her bedroom. Common sense told her that she should eat something, especially since she was drinking, but she had barely been able to eat lunch because of her nerves and she doubted she’d be able to eat dinner.  
  
With the twins due to arrive soon, she took a quick shower and put on a comfortable pair of pajamas afterwards. She then went around her apartment, closing all of the curtains and casting silencing charms. The last thing she wanted was for someone to find out what she was doing.  
  
A few minutes after eight, her fireplace filled with green flames and George appeared.  
  
“Are you ready for us?” he asked, peering out at her.  
  
Hermione nodded and he stepped into the room. A minute later, the fireplace lit up again and Fred entered the apartment.  
  
“Would you two like something to drink?” she asked, clutching her empty wine glass. She was feeling slightly more relaxed, but she wasn’t ready to pleasure herself with them standing outside the room.  
  
“Ogden’s if you have it,” George replied.  
  
They followed her into the kitchen and she poured their drinks before filling her wine glass half way.  
  
“Where do you want us to setup?” Fred asked, once he and his brother had finished their drinks.  
  
“I thought I’d go into the bedroom and you guys could wait in the hall,” she replied.  
  
The twins looked at each other and appeared to be having a silent disagreement that had them shaking their heads at each other.  
  
“Is something wrong?” she asked.  
  
George tapped his watch and then smirked at Fred.  
  
Fred sighed and then said, “We, uh, need to be in the room with you.”  
  
Hermione felt her heart stop and she stared back at them in shock.  
  
“We need to make sure everything works and fits the way it should,” he added, quickly. “This is all purely research related, remember?”  
  
She forced a nod and then picked up her wine glass and took a long sip.  
  
“We’ll go setup,” George said, pushing his brother towards the bedroom.  
  
Finishing her glass of wine, Hermione turned towards the sink and stared at the white wall above it. What had she gotten herself into?  
  
 _It’s going to be fun,_ the small voice from the day before said. _A little crazy. A little daring._  
  
 _It’s also indecent,_ the second voice spoke up. _You’re not seeing either of them. Never mind the fact that they’re Ron’s brothers._  
  
 _You’re right, Miss Goody-Goody_ , the first voice said, sarcastically. _We’ll just go back on our promise to help them and leave them scrambling to find another sexy witch to test out their products._  
  
Hermione knew the naughty voice was right. There was no way that she could go back on her promise to help the twins.  
  
Taking a deep breath, she pushed away from the sink and then made her way to her bedroom.  
  
Fred and George had put a small box on her dresser and had dimmed the lights.  
  
“We put some stuff in the bathroom for you to change into,” George told her. “We’ll wait out here.”  
  
Going into the bathroom, Hermione shut the door and leaned against it for a minute, trying to relax. She then found a pair of black knickers and a matching black bra on the counter. She changed her clothes slowly and then put her dressing gown back on, covering up the semi-revealing lingerie.  
  
“Did they fit alright?” Fred asked when she reentered her bedroom.  
  
“Perfectly,” she replied. “Where do you want me?”  
  
“The bed is fine,” George said.  
  
Hermione walked over to her bed and sat down on the end.  
  
“The bra and the knickers are our first items,” Fred explained. “We thought we’d start off with the easy stuff.”  
  
“Alright,” Hermione replied, nodding.  
  
As she watched, George waved his wand, casting a silent spell. Almost immediately, Hermione felt her breasts being squeezed. Shocked, she pulled her dressing gown away from her body and looked down the front. The bra was still in place, but it felt like two hands were moving inside of it, cupping and kneading her breasts.  
  
“How does it feel?”  
  
Hermione opened her mouth to reply, but snapped it shut when her nipples were brushed by what felt like thumbs.  
  
“Hermione?”  
  
“Fantastic,” she said in disbelief. “Like two hands—Oh!—are inside and -”  
  
The words died on her lips as George waved his wand again and the invisible hands became more forceful.  
  
“Too much! Too much!” she cried out after a few seconds.  
  
George quickly backed it off and Hermione soon found herself panting.  
  
“Are you ready for the knickers now?” Fred asked.  
  
She managed a nod and nearly screamed when she felt the first vibrations from the crotch of the knickers. The vibrations traveled up and down the cotton front then paused just above her clit before repeating the cycle.  
  
Overcome with all of the sensations, she threw herself backwards on the bed and then yanked on the sash of her dressing gown, letting it fall open. She forgot all about her audience as the feelings ravaged her body.  
  
Her body stiffened as she climaxed and the room was filled with her cries as her toes dug into the carpet below her feet. The vibrations from the knickers and the massaging from the bra died away as she recovered from the most intense orgasm she’d had in several months.  
  
“Hermione?” one of the twins said a few minutes later.  
  
Sitting up, Hermione pulled her dressing gown closed and felt her face flush as she avoided the eyes of the twins.  
  
“I’d say that worked better than we had imagined it would.”  
  
She could only nod.  
  
“Do you want to take a few minutes before we test the next product?”  
  
Hermione nodded and eased herself up onto her shaky legs. She went into the bathroom and leaned against the counter.  
  
 _Those boys are geniuses!_ The naughty voice cried out. _That was amazing._  
  
 _It was pretty good_ , the goody goody voice agreed. _Though, think of the number of O.W.L.S. they could have gotten if they’d just applied themselves._  
  
“Shut up,” Hermione muttered to the second voice. Her brain felt like mush following her orgasm and, to her surprise, she didn’t really mind.  
  
After cleaning herself up, she reentered the room and found that the twins had moved her ottoman from in front of her reading chair to the foot of the bed. Lying on the cushion was an old book and what looked like a clump of mistletoe.  
  
“You’re going to have to take off your knickers for these,” George told her. “We’ll go get something to drink while you undress and get into your bed.”  
  
Hermione waited for them to leave and then slipped off the vibrating knickers. As an afterthought, she also removed the bra and put on an old tank top.  
  
Moving to the bed, she saw that they had removed her comforter and blanket, leaving just the top sheet for her to cover herself with. Shaking her head, she climbed into bed and rested her head on her pillows.  
  
A few minutes later, a knock sounded on the door.  
  
“I’m ready,” she called.  
  
They came into the room and Fred handed her a shot glass of Firewhiskey. She tipped her head back and scrunched up her face as the liquid burned her throat.  
  
“We’ll need you to scoot closer to us,” George instructed.  
  
Hermione sat up and glared at him.  
  
“We’re not going to look,” he assured her. “But we need to be able to exchange things with you.”  
  
Sheet clutched at her waist, she scooted down the bed and pulled a pillow with her.  
  
“We’ll let you choose what you want to use first,” Fred said, holding up the mistletoe and the old book.  
  
Hermione raised her eyebrow.  
  
“We know what you’re thinking,” George said, grinning. “How can either get you off? What we have here are two cleverly designed toy hiders.”  
  
To demonstrate, he took the mistletoe from his brother and then tapped it with his wand. The mistletoe leaves came together and, in a matter of seconds, took the shape of a short, cylindrical object. He then pressed one of the white berries and the whole thing began to vibrate.  
  
“We call it The Nargle,” he said, holding it out to Hermione.  
  
Taking it, she was surprised by how solid it felt. Slipping her hand beneath the sheet, she pressed the toy against her clit and let out a long sigh as it vibrated against her.  
  
“When you’re ready,” Fred said, interrupting her., “We also have these.”  
  
Unable to concentrate with the toy pressed against her clit, Hermione pulled it away and looked up at Fred.  
  
She watched as he opened the book and revealed three long dildos: one with the markings and design of a wand, another in the shape of a lightning bolt, and the third a replica of a real penis.  
  
“A lightning bolt, really?” she asked, turning off the little vibrator.  
  
“They’re all the rage,” George stated. “Don’t have a clue why, though.”  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes.  
  
“You don’t have to try them all,” Fred said as he set the book next to her. “You can pick your favorite.”  
  
Hermione nodded and passed right by the lightning bolt; the twins might be able to joke about it, but she knew why the shape was so popular. She also knew that Harry, Ginny and Mr. and Mrs. Weasley would never allow them to sell such a product—assuming they actually saw them.  
  
The wand was thicker and shorter than the one she carried and, obviously, not made of wood. Picking it up, she found that the rough looking object was actually smooth. The wand, however, could not hold her attention, as her eyes kept moving back to the realistic cock that remained in the book. She returned the wand and then picked up the cock, noticing immediately that it was slightly heavier than the wand had been.  
  
She couldn’t help but compare the dildo to the only real penis she’d ever seen and touched: Ron’s. The fake cock was a little shorter than Ron’s, but it was thicker.  
  
 _I wonder which one of the twins was the model_ , the naughty voice in her head said.  
  
 _They are business men!_ The goody-goody voice argued. _They would never!_  
  
“Shut up,” Hermione muttered.  
  
“Pardon?” one of the twins asked.  
  
“Nothing,” she replied.  
  
Eyes still focused on the fake cock, she ran her hand over the tip and was surprised when it lubricated itself. She ran her hand over the lube and then used her hand to spread it down the shaft.  
  
Glancing up at the twins, she felt herself redden when she saw both of them watching her hand.  
  
“Do you mind?”  
  
They both blushed and looked away.  
  
She slipped her hands under the sheets and parted her lips before positioning the tip of the dildo at her entrance. She pushed it in, slowly, adjusting to the size of it, before pulling it out and sliding it back in.  
  
“There is a spell you can cast to make it move on its own,” a far away voice said. “There are three speeds: slow, medium -”  
  
“Shut up and cast it then,” she interrupted.  
  
She soon felt the dildo begin to move on its own. It started out slow, but increased as she began to rock her hips along with the movements. Lost in the pleasure as it began to speed up again, her hands moved up her body and slipped under her shirt, kneading her breasts.  
  
As her body heated up, she kicked the sheet away and one of her hands slipped to her clit. She rubbed herself quickly as the fake cock began to vibrate and she knew she was close. One final thrust from the fake cock had her crying out as her body stiffened.  
  
As she lay on her bed recovering, the cock’s movements slowed and finally stopped, before it fell onto the bed between her legs.  
  
When she finally opened her eyes, Hermione looked up and saw the twins staring at her with matching, unreadable looks on their faces. She knew she had exposed herself, but instead of being embarrassed about it, she felt turned on. Even more so when she stole a glance at the front of their robes and saw matching bulges.  
  
Wordlessly, she sat up and removed her tank top—not that it had been covering anything for the last several minutes. She looked Fred in the eye and then George before licking her lips.  
  
“Your toys were fantastic,” she told them. “They gave me two incredible orgasms, but also wetted my appetite for the real thing.”  
  
“They did?” George asked, his voice lacking its usual cocky tone.  
  
Hermione nodded and rose to her knees. She crawled to the end of the bed and grabbed Fred’s collar, pulling him towards her. She licked his jaw and then kissed his lips.  
  
“Stop,” he said, halfheartedly, pushing her away.  
  
“Why?” she asked.  
  
“You’ve had too much to drink,” he replied.  
  
“I’m not drunk,” she assured him. “I’ll even take some potion to prove that alcohol has nothing to do with me wanting to be with you two tonight.”  
  
“Both of us?” they chorused.  
  
“Of course,” she replied. “You didn’t think I’d make one of you watch, did you?”  
  
“You’re sure about this?” Fred asked.  
  
“A hundred percent,” she replied. She kissed him again before turning and pulling George over to her. She kissed him, too, and even slipped him a bit of tongue.  
  
Ending the kiss, she crawled up to the head of the bed, swaying her hips a little more than necessary, and laid back against her pillows. She saw the twins exchange a glance before they began to undress.  
  
Soon, the brothers joined her, one on either side of her, and she could tell by the way they kissed her and touched her body that they’d shared witches before. They took turns kissing her and when it wasn’t their turn, they’d kiss other parts of her body while their hands massaged her breasts simultaneously—nearly the same way the bra had.  
  
She could feel their hard cocks pressing against her and reached down, taking one in each hand, realizing immediately that they both felt exactly like the fake one.  
  
 _Told you so_ , the naughty voice gloated.  
  
Running her thumbs over the tips of their penises, she felt them both shudder and groan. She moved her hands simultaneously, guiding them up and down their thick shafts.  
  
The twin she was kissing pulled away and she whimpered when she found herself with a mouth on each nipple; licking, sucking and nipping at it. Her hands left their cocks and fisted themselves in their hair.  
  
She felt their hands slip between her legs, parting them, before she felt one hand spread her lips and felt a finger slide into her while another brushed her clit. They brought her to the very edge of cumming, before backing off and letting go of her completely.  
  
She opened her eyes, confused, and saw Fred smiling at her. He kissed her lips and then rolled over so he was on his back, resting against her pillows. He wrapped a hand around his cock while his eyes remained locked with hers.  
  
Rolling onto her stomach, Hermione watched as he began to massage himself. She licked her lips and scooted forward on the bed, settling her mouth just above the tip of his cock. She took a teasing swipe at it with her tongue, but before she could do anything more, she felt George’s hands take hold of her hips and pull her up.  
  
Resting her forearms on Fred’s thighs, Hermione lifted her bum into the air then felt the tip of George’s penis teasing the entrance to her sex. She purred as he ran the tip down her folds and to her clit and shuddered as he teased her there. Then he drew his cock back up her folds and slid into her in one fluid motion.  
  
The momentum of his initial thrust sent her straight into Fred’s cock. She wrapped her hand around the thick member and fell into a rhythm as George fucked her from behind; alternating between using her hand and her mouth on Fred.  
  
Growing closer to another release, she let go of Fred’s cock and held onto his thighs, using his strength to help keep her up. She felt George stiffen behind her and he cried out loudly as he came inside of her.  
  
Spent, he pulled out of her, but before she even knew what was happening, Fred pulled her forward and lowered her onto his cock. Using what little energy she had left, she rocked herself against him, but as her third orgasm hit, she felt him lower her backwards onto the bed and he continued to fuck her.  
  
As Fred slid in and out of her, Hermione felt George’s hand slip between her body and Fred’s and she felt the vibrations of The Nargle on her clit. She heard Fred moan above her and knew that that the vibrator was working on him too.  
  
Her fourth and final orgasm of the night hit her moments later and was followed by Fred emptying himself inside her. He fell panting against her side and they lay there for several minutes before they could move.  
  
\---  
  
The next morning, Hermione woke up sandwiched between the twins. There was a hand on her breast and another on her bum.  
  
 _The best way to wake up_ , the voice in her head said.  
  
 _It is rather nice_ , the other voice agreed.  
  
Hermione sighed happily and closed her eyes.  
  
She certainly hadn’t planned on sleeping with the twins, but it had been fun and she deserved some fun every now and then.


End file.
